My sister went through something horrible today (sad)

Her 87 year old neighbor shot herself in the head while talking to my sister today 🙁

My sister and family were very close with this lady, she loved my nephew dearly and always went out on her porch every morning when he gets picked up by his bus to go to work (he's 21 and special needs for those of you who don't know and has a little job now), anyway, she would always be out there to wave to him. She always baked for Tracy (my sis) and bro in law and nephew and brought them apple dumplings once a week.

She called my sister today and told her that she woke up this morning and was completely blank, couldn't remember who she was or wear she was,... She came "back" to herself but she told Tracy she didn't want to live that way and that she was going to go out on her porch and shoot her self in the head. Tracy told her she was going to come right over and not to do anything (she lives right next door).... Trace put the phone down to call 911 and she heard the gun shot and looked out and saw her there on the porch. Tracy called 911 and they came. She feels so bad but she was afraid to go over there and she knew in her heart that her neighbor was not alive anymore. The police came, they interogated my sister, looked at her phone to see on her caller ID that the lady had called and the time of the call. As you can imagine my sister was a mess but she's better now. Before the lady did this she asked Tracy if she would call her son and tell him about her call to Trace and why she did it.

I'm getting ready to call her back now to see how she is. My poor sister and that lady's family 🙁

She had told Tracy many times that she never wanted to be old enough to be senile and that she would never live that way or in a nursing home... It's so sad and shocking and I don't think my sis has gone through all the emotions that she will through this, I can't even imagine how she must really be feeling... she even said she feels guilty that maybe there was more she could do to stop her but Tracy knew in her heart that she was going to do it, she just didn't expect while she was on the phone with her... Say some prayers or good thoughts over for the lady's family and for my sis too (and my nephew and bro in law because they will be very sad too)

Oh my god hun that is sooo shocking. I can't imagine what your sister must have gone through, or what was going through her neighbours mind at the time she did it. I suppose all i can say is at least she got her wish that she never went senile. It is just such a shame that her death involved other people being shocked and hurt. I am sending many good thoughts to your sister and her family and also to her neighbours family. I hope that your sister doesn't get too het up about what she could/should have done. This lady was obviously determined she did not want to live like that and was terrified after that morning that is what was going to happen. I don't think there was anything that your sister could have done to stop her doing it. I am sending a huge hug for you too hun as although i realise you weren't close to her neighbour it must be an upsetting and worrying time for you as you are worrying about your sister. 😘 😘 Xx

It is shocking, I couldn't believe what I was hearing when Tracy was telling me this. I keep trying to call her cell and her house phone and she's not answering, I'm wondering if she may be with her friend's family right now? I just want to talk to her again and make sure she's ok 🙁

omg im sorry to hear that i hope your sister will be okay its one of them situations noone can ever imagine what it must be like to be in it or how we would react. i must admit i have no idea what to say, i hope everyone involved wont be too deeply effected by this (i cant find the words to say what i want to say sorry)

That's ok Ellee, it was hard for me to know what to say to my sister... I just talked to her a few minutes ago and she still seems ok enough. She just keeps wondering why she called Tracy as this lady had lots of other friends in the neighborhood... she thinks maybe because Tracy is the closest one to her and she asked that Tracy "take care of things" for her... Tracy and I both can't understand why she would go out on her porch to do it, outside, other than she was thinking unselfishly and didn't want someone to have to deal with things inside the house iykwim?

It's just so sad and shocking 🙁

maybe she wanted to see the outside world for one last time

unfortunately with suicides there will always be a million questions that can never be answered for the friends and family of the victim the only thing that can really be of any comfort was she had lived a long good happy life and seemed like a really nice caring lady who will be missed by all those around her and had decided the prosect of going senile and forgetting who she was where she was and what she had done was a scary thought for her (i think it is a fear for many of us just people dont want to admit it is) and she decided that she wanted to die with her memories in tact instead of being a shell of the person she once was crippled by the unforgiving illness/condition/disease that is dementia.

i think she loved your sister very much from what you have said and knew she could trust your sister and maybe thats why she chose to speak to her and explain why she done what she done that one of the other neighbours who may not have fully understood her reasonings.

Oh my goodness Tam, your poor sister and families involved!

I really do not know what else to say, it must be such a shock to everyone involved.

xxxxxxxx

oh god! that's bizarre! it must have been difficult for your sister to know that her neigbour is dead, who just called her and committed a thing like this. how'z your sister now. i hope she is fine now, i know that these things make a big impact on you. i hope she is fine

OMG what an awful experience. I hope she is getting support.

Oh my goodness. How sad for the lady to get so low to do that and what a shock for your sister 🙁 I hope your sis is ok. I'm not surprised she didn't go over...I don't thonk I could have either.

😘 To your sister Tam,i hope she is ok and dealing with it as best as possible.What a shock it must have been for your sister as it all happened so suddenly.

thanks you guys, I haven't talked to her today I figured if she wanted to call me and talk about it she would, I'm thinking she just wants to be free of talking about for atleast a day, I'll call her tomorrow and see how she is....

Sounds very sensible hun. Sometimes you just need a break from talking about things like that and have some sort of normality. Like you said i'm sure she would ring you if she needed to talk to you hun. Fingers crossed when you speak to her tommorow she will still be ok. It really ust have been such a surreal but awful situation to be in. I wonder if it would really have even hit her yet?

I'm wondering the same thing Mandy 🙁