when it's time to see a specialist?

Hi ppl! I'm 36, married, we have no children, but we really want to become parents. We've been ttc for 2 yrs and nothing. I haven't got pregnant even once. I had zero miscarriages. We’ve never tried ivf. I think maybe it's time for us to see a specialist. At the same time I'm so scared to hear a verdict that I'm infertile. I'm almost 100% sure that I'm the reason of our long and unsuccessful ttc. DH has a child from previous relationships. So he's fertile and everything ok with him. I understand that waiting and wasting time will give nothing. I know we have to seek help. But as I've mentioned already I'm very scared. What if I'm infertile? What if doctors say we have zero chances to conceive? How to cope with such diagnosis? 24/7 I'm thinking what can be a reason that I can't get pregnant. I know I'm not young, but I'm not overweight, I don't smoke/drink... What can be a reason of inability to conceive? I'm sorry I know these questions have been already asked thousands times. I understand my situation isn't something new and unusual... But please talk to me, because I'm going crazy. I relly need some advice. Thanks xx

I’m sorry you couldn’t conceive during these years. I completely agree with you! There is no time to waste. Both you and your dh should start thinking about next step. If you are under 35 and you and your partner have been trying for a year, talk to your doctor about undergoing fertility testing to find the cause. If you are older than 35 and have been trying for at least 6 months, experts recommend that you consult a doctor. Of course, anytime you have concerns - regardless of your age - you should talk to your doctor. Unfortunately about one in ten couples experience infertility. The good news is that the majority of infertility cases can be treated, whether by addressing the cause or by methods such as ivf, de ivf, surrogacy etc. For women, there are several conditions and factors that cause most of the cases of infertility. Let's start with age. It's the single most important determining factor for a successful and healthy pregnancy. When a woman is around age 35, her egg quality and quantity decline significantly. To put it into perspective, a 25-year-old healthy woman may have a 30 percent chance of pregnancy trying the good old-fashioned way, a 38-year-old woman has a 10 percent chance, and a 42-year-old woman has only a 1 percent chance. Aside from age, one of the most common causes of female infertility is infrequent ovulation. This is often the result of hormonal problems or conditions such as pcos, in which a woman produces excess male hormones and does not ovulate regularly. Fallopian tube blockage is another possible culprit. Blockage is typically the result of scarring, from a pelvic infection, a previous ectopic pregnancy, or surgeries such as appendectomy or removal of ovarian cysts (a prior abortion rarely affects fertility). Some women are also prone to developing growths called fibroids or polyps in the uterus; this may block fallopian tubes or lead to infertility and miscarriages. Hun, my advice to you will be to go to a specialist asap. Don’t waste time on googling causes of infertility because only doctor can make a proper diagnosis. Good luck!

Dear you're not alone! The longer you wait to seek help, the more challenging conception becomes. But with comprehensive treatment, most couples can become biological parents one way or another. The first step toward overcoming fertility issues is to understand what the label "infertile" really means. The technical definition of infertility for women under 35 is an inability to get pregnant after one year of trying; for women over 35, it applies after six months of attempting to conceive.
Women tend to face a wider variety of roadblocks on the way to conception. As previous poster has already mentioned, about 25 percent of infertility issues are due to blocked tubes. That could be a result of pelvic inflammatory disease, endometriosis, or ectopic pregnancy. Another 25 percent of issues are due to ovulatory dysfunction. Primary ovarian insufficiency (POI) is another common condition, in which the ovaries stop functioning properly in women under 40. Another 10 percent of female-related infertility is attributable to abnormalities in the uterus that require surgical correction. These commonly include uterine fibroids, noncancerous growths within the uterus, or structural problems with the uterus. But in roughly 20 to 25 percent of infertility cases, the cause is completely unknown. That means all tests are normal and the cause is likely related to age in one or both partners.
Only your doctor can tell you the cause and prognosis for your situation, but there are often several treatment options. IVF can be particularly effective in treating absent or blocked fallopian tubes or low sperm counts, but it's better to attempt it sooner rather than later. If IVF is unsuccessful and there are no issues with carrying a pregnancy, many women are excellent candidates for using donor eggs or embryos. For women who have enough eggs but cannot carry a pregnancy, implanting her eggs in a surrogate is another option. Wish you luck dear!

I think it’s already time for both you and your dh to see a doctor. Don’t be afraid! It’s better to face the problem and start doing something about it. If you're worried about how long it's taking to get pregnant, your first stop may be your ob-gyn or family doctor. They can perform basic tests to determine whether you're ovulating normally or may be experiencing problems with your fallopian tubes, ovaries, or uterus. While your regular doctor may be able to prescribe drugs that jump-start ovulation or perform outpatient procedures to treat fibroids or endometriosis, for example, you'll need to see a specialist for more complex procedures like IVF.
Women 35 or older, or who know they have health conditions that may affect fertility, may choose to bypass their own doctors and head straight to an RE. You usually don't need a referral to visit a reproductive endocrinologist.
Start by asking your current ob-gyn or family physician, friends, or family members for a referral. During your first phone call or visit, ask the doctor or office staff about costs, insurance coverage, and payment plans. Infertility testing and treatment require a big commitment from you and your doctor. You'll want to make sure you've chosen someone you're comfortable with and trust with important emotional and financial decisions.

Something like 90% of people get pregnant within 3 months of starting to try, so it's not necessarily normal. It's about time to talk to your doctor, assuming you've been tracking your cycles and optimizing your timing.

agree that it is time to see a dr.
we have been ttcing for a few years before we understood that things weren't working out. we got to seek help. and we did. but the diagnosis was a bit vague. I was diagnosed with unexplained infertility. Turns out it is a pretty common diagnosis. however, I do not know what to do with this info. it is just the reason to try ivf. which we have been trying for 2 rounds.