feeling frustrated - need to vent

Hi everyone. I’m new to this forum. I know you're all going through a similar situation like me. I just want to say that lately I'm feeling so depressed about this whole ttc. It's been a little over 4 years for me and DH. I just want to burst out crying. I pray so much, my family is praying, my friends are praying. I'm scared and frustrated and very envious of the girls around me getting pregnant. I want to see the light at the end of the tunnel. All I think about is "what if I was already 3 or 4 or 5 months pregnant." I imagine me telling my husband the news and all this wonderful things. I'm sorry if this is too much, but I don't want DH to get tired of me complaining and feeling sorry for myself. On the other hand, I'm very happy for the women on this forum that have achieved pregnancy. When I read their stories it gives me hope. I would love feedback. Thanks for listening.

I am so sorry you feel down. I know how hard it is to try and hope without any results. It is very frustrating but just keep your vision on the end results, which is a very happy healthy and beautiful baby! The hardest lesson I am learning through all this is that God works on his time. And his time and my time never seem to come together! But in the end things always work out. It’s OK to have a bad day every now and then. But try really hard to not let it consume you and get you down for long. Things always have a way of working out, you just HAVE to believe it will and it will. I know how painful it is to see everyone is pregnant. For me the hardest part is receiving invitations for baby showers. At such moment I feel so down. My brain is playing with me at such moments… A voice deep inside telling me I may never be a mom, I may never have a baby shower. The most important thing is do not listen to that voice! I know I meant to be a mother and I will be no matter what! Good luck sweetheart!

I know what you mean... Everyone around me is getting pregnant. It is hard to deal with. And family and friends who haven't had fertility issues do not understand. So it's nice to come here and get feedback from all of you, and hear that I'm not alone. If it wasn't for this message board, I probably would of driven every friend and family member away... They can only take so much, and they just don't get it.... But you can vent your frustrations and share your ups and downs with us anytime. Hang in there and do your best not to let those seeds of doubt plant. I just try to always believe that it will happen. Not the way I planned but it WILL happen! If I say it enough times, I believe it.
I think that we all know how you feel. For me, the depression from TTC and the miscarriages was too much for me to handle. I tried one fertility support group before this one but that wasn’t very helpful. Probably that wasn’t right place for me. I’m happy to be here with you girls! This community is very supportive.
So after being at the ‘wrong’ board I went to see a therapist which really helped. I told her how hard it was for me to see other pregnant girls. How hard it is to see these perfect families with children.
What I can say is keep trudging on. The end result, however you have a baby through pregnancy, donor eggs, adoption, is sooooo worth it. But remember that this is your ride. You can get off this emotional roller coaster WHENEVER you need a break. Sometimes a break can be good but I know that I never wanted to take time off from TTC!

Hi Honey, Hope you are doing good. I am sorry to hear about your problem. Yeah! This is really annoying and frustrated matter. I understand your feeling. Honey, I have also faced this issue. I know how much embarrassing to face the friends and family in this situation. But I am with you and I hope you will be successfully pregnant. When I was at your stage I got hope from the forums. after reading the success story of the people I feel why I am not? I can be and I have to. I am also praying for you. I am waiting for your next report. So be brave and trust in GOD. Don't frustrate yourself you are not alone on this earth. Million of people are trying to resolve the same issue. So Just keep a smile and Be brave. GOD Blessed you.

I know there are not much comforting words I can offer. I’m also experiencing the same thing. It’s just that my dh & I’ve been trying for 7 yrs now. I know how frustrating it is when every month af shows up. I don’t want it… I want to get pregnant so bad. I did IVF in September, but m/c last week. We will try again next month (ivf again). That is going to be our last try… After that I don’t know what to do anymore. Well dr. thinks donor eggs may work… But I don’t want to think about it right now. I put all hopes in upcoming IVF. I leave everything in GOD's hands. I believe if it’s HIS will, then it will happen. Hang in there girl... But it’s not easy to stay positive, when you see a baby or pregnant women. I'm just glad that I have a wonderful DH. I just think about all the good things happened and good people around me. Good luck to you and to all who ttc.

I can relate. Such days like this one are really sad for me and my dh. Especially seeing others with children everywhere. Seeing all those posts on facebook… It's not fair at all. Some of us here desperate for a baby. Meanwhile others don't want them or don't plan to have them. It's just happen. I don't know what to say except "LIFE'S SUCKS". The only thing we can do is try to relax. And don't put things in mind that can stress you out or even mentally disturb you. Ignore things outside and focus on you to conceive. I wish you the best. Hopefully each of us will have BFP. Take care.

Hey there! I feel so bad for you hun! Trust me, there's nothing to worry about. You should go for assisted conception. It's something that is helping a lot of people nowadays. Even I have started my surrogacy. You should do some actions too. Just don't sit there and do nothing. There are a lot of good clinics out there which can help you. So hang in there. Have you gone to see a specialist yet? Pursuing IUI or IVF? I regret spending so much time hoping it would happen naturally and being afraid to get help. Science is wonderful and there is hope!

I can understand how you might be feeling. Sometimes being on this journey can be extremely hard. I am in the same boat as yours. It is full of highs and lows. I always describe my journey as a roller coaster. I would suggest you to maybe change your lifestyle. Start eating more healthily and drink lots of water. Apart from that make sure the doctor you are visiting knows how to carry the process out. Good luck xx

Hey Amber! I'm very sorry to read about your struggle, dear. I know it must be very hard for you. I've been through this too which is why I know how ashamed one feels. It must be embarrassing for you in front of your husband, I've felt this too. But, you're lucky that your husband supports you. Everything will get better soon, trust me. 4 years is long but isn't longer than 7 years, dear. I and my husband were TTC for 7 years after which I delivered my son. We had been through a very terrible phase and I just wish no one ever has to go through it. Just don't lose hope, you can't fail like this. Be strong and fight for it. I'll pray that you become a mother soon. Lots of love and prayers for you. Good luck!

I know what you are going through. although my family is really supportive. But I can sense the tension I myself am going through. it is no others but I who is pressuring myself. and it is the worst. My husband does not want to rush things. But I do. I want to become a mother and it pains me that I can't.

I so can relate. We’ve been ttc for years and nothing but heartache and stress. Some days I feel broken and sick, others I feel so positive about future and full of hope but thoughts that we may fail again are always there in the back of my mind. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever been through. I will never be the same again. Even when I’ll have a baby I don’t think this feeling will ever leave me. I’ve stopped going to baby showers long time ago. I can’t cope with them anymore. Seeing everyone else’s dreams come true when I am fighting for mine is too hard. I honestly do not know if it will ever work for me and my dh. But I’m not ready to give up. I will do everything I can to have my own child. I’m trying not to put too much pressure on myself. I’m trying to enjoy each day and be happy no matter what. I just have to. I have only one life. There won’t be a chance to go back. Some days I feel like I just want to put my pjs on and cry it out. And sometimes I let myself cry. It’s ok to feel sorry for yourself. Sometimes we need this too. This journey is exhausting so don’t be too hard on yourself. Just don’t forget to live and enjoy the moment.