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  4. I'm Empty inside

I'm Empty inside

Journal date: 25 November 2008

So here i am again.. writing to you all about my problems conceiving! Well its very difficult as some of you may know and i am finding this the hardest thing in life ever! The more anxious i am to become a mum the more it seems likes its never going to happen and now i have got to the point where i have given up hope. Everyday i struggle to get out of bed i cant handle seeing another baby or pregnant women incase i break down in tears, i feel like lifes not worth living anymore. Everytime i get a little bit of hope something comes crashing down and leaves me feeling even worse than before and i dont know how to deal with it anymore i just feel so empty. I keep thinkin why has this happened to me? What did i do that was so wrong that god is punishing me for and i keep trying to find answers, ways to work aroung it, take my mind off things but i never can. I cant even face goign to work anymore as i work with baby clothes and essentials. What do i do? I need someone to tell me where i go from here what do i do next.. but no one has the answer to give me, no one knows. I have lost all of my faith in god beacause if he was there he would see how i am feeling and help me surely? I would be such a brillant mum why cant it just be my time? Will this angony go on forever?

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Comments

mum2popsnjak
mum2popsnjak 17 years 9 months ago

Aww hun. This must be sooo hard for you, as you know i have two cildren and can't imagine how hard things are for you at the moment. It sounds like you are getting clinically depressed, if you haven't been diagnosed already i would get yourself toyour GP and tell him exactly how you are feeling. There are so many things that can be done to help people struggling to conceive and i'm sure one day it will be your turn. I know it is so easy for me to say but getting so upset and stressed about the situation is going to make trying to conceive much harder for you as stress can upset your cycle. Try (with the help of your doctor) to get your stress/depression under control and you may find that it happens for you? I really hope you start feeling better soon hun, keep smiling. :hug: :hug: :hug: Xx

wannabemum's blog

So heart breaking

Previous Journal Entries

NOV 15 2008
Still no joy!

2

SEP 9 2008
Still no luck!
AUG 26 2008
So happy!
AUG 22 2008
Putting my mind to rest!
AUG 21 2008
Putting the pressure on!

1

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