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Are you and your partner on the same page?

posted 8 years 2 months ago
Do you and your partner agree on parenting techniques? In another thread I realized how this has been the hardest part of being a parent, the fact that my husband and I do not agree on a lot of a child raising practices. I never realized we would be so far apart, especially since we lived peacefully, happily, child free for many years together.

Are you and your partner on the same page when it comes to rising your children?

posted 8 years 1 month ago
The answer to that question is NO! My husband thinks I spoil our son, he wants to raise him with management skills. He want to withdraw some childhood luxuries from him simply because he wants to teach him how to manage. How do you teach a 2-year old management skills? It has been really annoying trying to educate him on providing the basic needs for our child, but he calls them luxuries and this often puts us both on different pages raising our son.

posted 8 years 1 month ago
When it came to our kids, and how we wanted them to be raised it seemed that was one of the only things that my ex husband and I would agree on. We both made compromises, but putting the kids needs first we were always able to agree in the end. We never agreed about any other area though. I had a long time boyfriend that parented complete different than me, it was difficult on all of us, until we decided to met in the middle of an normally every day issues. The bigger issues were more challenging. But at the end of the day, we managed to co parent pretty nicely. Even with our different styles.

posted 8 years 1 month ago
I would say for the most part we are on the same page. We hold a weekly "marriage meeting" and discuss anything we see as issues for not just our relationship but for anything happening in our child's life (and when she's old enough, she will also be part of the meeting as we want to hear her thoughts too!)

I think communication is key with any sort of difference of opinion. If you talk it out calmly, and bring your points to the table, even if there's a difference I'm sure there's some middle ground that can be reached Smile

posted 8 years 1 month ago
For the most part my husband and I are on the same page about parenting, and about people and life. If we differ on a parenting issue it's because he more strict with the kids than I am. We usually end up talking afterwards and seeing the other's point of view. Kids need consistency so if they see that mom and dad aren't waivering they know there is no point in pushing an issue. It's when they see that they can get away with more with one parent that you see the problems.

posted 8 years 1 month ago
Yep I can totally relate to not agreeing on how we raise the kids. But seeing that I am the one to take care of them while he is working abroad he has no authority in the matter. Also I am a strict mom and I don't believe in spoiling our kids. Yes I don't mind they get rewarded or sometimes a little pampered and coddled. Just not spoiling them as well as teaching them discipline and respect for others. My hubby is more soft hearted than I am. Seeing as I have three daughters I have a lot to worry about. There is no perfect parenting techniques its different for all and it is really up to the kids in what they absorb and take with them in the future. I hope they will take what I teach them and use it in their everyday lives when they grow up. My hubby and I can argue sometimes about a lot of things we do with our children but in the end he will listen to me unless it is something big.

Sometimes its okay to agree on disagreeing. I can't imagine how it is having to live with my hubby the whole year through and going at each other because of how we expect the kids to be brought up. Props to you guys for sticking in and handling or sorting it out.

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