Im feeling so down over him!!!

These last few weeks have been very hard for me! I started seeing my ex again after a year apart. We split because i couldnt trust him and he was very aggressive towards me, but during the time we were split he told me that he had time to think and had changed his ways and realised what was important and that he wasnt interested in any other woman but me and wanted us to meet up and talk. So after thinking about it for a bit and realising i did still love and miss him i decided to meet up with him for a drink.

We talked for hours about things and i feltl all them old feelings coming back again and thought id give him the b&d and arranged to meet him again. He told me he was working in my city for the month so i thought this would be a good time to see how it goes and if he really had changed.

We were getting on really well and ii started staying out with him but from then on its been like he wants to cause arguments for nothing and likes to see me wound up about things, he let me borrow his car and there were condoms on the floor and in the seats and i asked him about it and he said they must have fell out of his bag but we never used them and he was in a different city so why would he have them there but i never got an answer and let it go. When he went back to his city after his contract ran out i went down to see him on a weekend and he knew i was coming and i found someones jewelly on his desk and he told me that was from years ago but i said to him if thats the case then why leave it there knowing im gonna see i it wasnt there the last time i was down.. I found a bit from a hairdryer which i thought was mine from the last time i visited him so i put it on the side to bring home with me and the next morning he hid it in his bag before he went to work on the morning, i asked where it was and he told me so i went to get it out of the bag he walks around everyday with and in his bag was condoms and lubicant. When i got home it didnt fit my hairdryer so i binned it and was upset for a while about it but he said i was being stupid.

I went to his house two weeks ago and whist i was there he said that he had found a new place to buy his clothers from and wanted me to see it with him. I was cool with that and as we are parking up he says that he thinks that the girl in there fancies him and then said nah im only kidding and i just laughed it off but when we got inside this shop he walked up to the shop assistant and asked for the girl by her name and the assistant said she wasnt there and he asked why not?? I was angry about this and i walked out i just thought he had done it on purpose then he came out after and started getting aggressive with me in the street and walked off from me saying i was an idiot and left me there. Eventually i rang him up and met up with him at the car with him telling me i was out of order. Then i came home but i was kinda upset all week about the way hes been going on. When im there he takes the phone out of the wall and in the middle of the night he gets calls and wont answer them.

The only last week he called me whilst he was out and i was at home and he asked me what i was doing and i was just chilling and i told him to call me when he had finished, i have always had probs with him being out because he flirts with the woman so i dont like to know when he s out but he called me again that night but didnt talk i could just hear him in the background chatting up another woman I listened for a bit then he hung up then i called him back and had ago at him. He said i was being pathetic.

Now because of the way he has been acting again i have had to stop all contact with him im really hurting and im not sleeping and im really down because i really love him. He had been trying to get in touch and the last msg he said is that i have done this on perpose and have over reacted i am evil and pathetic and he hope we never cross paths again. now im thinking i have done the wrong thing he hates me now and i dont know maybe i did over react i dont know what to do please help me. I left it for a few weeks and we have had no contact then i text him a few days ago just to say i wished we had worked out and that im not a horrible person and i hope we are not on bad terms and now he is asking me to meet him for a drink. I dont know what to do now!! (sorry its long)

The best thing you can do is to cut all ties with him. I know it's so so hard when you love someone. You want to believe they can change and you hope that you'll end up together happily,but it's not always the case. If you've been apart and this is his idea of being a changed man then I'd hate to se how he treated you first time round! He sounds like a player, he sounds manipulative-saying you're the one with the problem all the time! You are lucky in that you don't live together or have kids. There is no reason for you to have him in your life and you should walk away while you can. There are so many people out there who thought they'd never get over their love, but further down the line they are happy and settled and they look back and realise what an idiot their ex was and how much better off they are now without them. Every time you see him you are taking a step back and you are that much further away from getting over him again.