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new single parent

posted 1 decade 4 years ago
Been on this forum for around a year now and with no internet in the house i need to come to the library so i aint on here that often but try to get on.

Am now a single parent and have been for around 4weeks offically. I had my wee girl on the 29th july.After weeks of arguing with my, now ex, we split. He then dated someone else just days after.Then we got back together to give it another go.Then at the start of november i found out he had been cheating on me with his new g/f (the girl he dated when we had split the first time).I have done everything for our little girl. I bought everything before she was born, did 99% of the feeds etc. He never helped one bit. I dont trust him, not even with our daughter. Ave asked him he's to be with lousie (our daughter) on his own and not with amy (the g/f). I wouldnt object if they had been dating a year. Am happy for him if he's happy with her. He gets her one day a week, even thats a push i think. As the week before i found out he'd been cheating on me he was supposed to come out and see lousie but made up excuse's to see his g/f.Am glad we aint together anymore as i was fed up of his bulls***e and lies.

Am glad am still at home with my parents as this is giving me a chance to save up money for a place of my own. I wont be able to afford my own place and absoultly S***ing myself. I know i wont be able to cope but i ken i'll make a good mum.

posted 1 decade 4 years ago
Sorry to hear it's ended up like this but you sound positive and strong. You don't need or deserve a man who would treat you like that. Let's hope he grows up and you all get on ok xx

posted 1 decade 4 years ago
When i had her he seldom helped me with her. I think he helped bath her once and fed her 5 times (including the bottle when she was first born). Ave coped on my own with or without him so far so here's to the next 17years and 7&a half month, lol Very happy.

One thing am worried about is when she gets older he's gonna make things difficult for me. I told him that not only did he cheat on me but he cheated on his daughter at the same time. Am also worried about the fact i wont be able to afford to put a roof over me and my daughter's head. Am thankful that am still at my parents until the council gives me a house. Money's extremly tight. but part from that i ken i can do it. My family and friends are supportive.

posted 1 decade 4 years ago
I stayed with my Dad for about 8 months after I split with James and Gem's dad, some parents are absolute godsends.

You are SO gonna be the best mum to Louise and her dad will be missing out not you or the baby- the fool!

Have you checked out what you are entitled to as far as tax credits go? You can get 80% of your childcare costs paid if you are going back to work, as well as discount on council tax as a single parent.

Once everything is sorted (and that won't take long) you'll be on cloud 10!!

Big hugs to you and baby xxxxxxxxxxx

posted 1 decade 4 years ago
Thanks for the advice. Im getting child benifit, tax credits and working tax credits. Thats a thing as am saving it up for when i get my own place. The money will pay for wallpaper, paint etc until i get on my feet then the money will go towards louise. Am working my shifts round my mums shifts at her work so i do 4 7hour shifts and 1 6hour shift. Its a bonus to me that she's free of charge, haha. I dont trust putting louise into a nursery etc (it would benefit her but not this young) as i dont trust her. When she's old enough to go to the nursery at the primary school she's going to then she'll go to it.

Am thankful that my mum and dad havent demanded me out the house, my mum would do nothing but worry if i was out on the streets. I ken she would never do that to me or louise. My dads the same.

posted 1 decade 4 years ago
If you need any more advice on parenting on a tight budget/in general there is a short film of expert advice on which I think is really useful. It features parents who have been through the same things. Hope it's useful!

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