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young mums

sammie83sammie83
posted 1 decade 4 years ago

mmmchocolate said:
hi like crazy chick i find it really hard to get on the buses with the pram so ive been using a baby sling as i get the bus every day, i can only imagine what i look like to other people im petite (5"2),am 23 but look about 17 an i take my two boys to school on the bus ages 5 an 4 with my 3 month old baby strapped to my chest an people just stare! old ladies tut an god forbid one of them has a tantrum because people just look at u like stupid little girl cant cope, shouldnt of had so many kids! Mad Tounge Out


i also have to get the bus with a DOUBLE pushchair, so as u can imagine i have had so many buses drive straight passed me. an i also sometimes wen i get on the bus there is some1 sittin where the pushchairs go an they dont move. if they stay there i "accidently" hit them with my pushchair Suspect


mmmchocolatemmmchocolate
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
Very happy i do that when people stop in front of me in town or in the supermarket!

GTTkelGTTkel
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
I wasn't a teenage mum,I had my first at 21,second at 24; but some people concidered me young and even now that I'm 25 none of my friends of the same age have babies yet. I'd like to say I don't think there is such a thing as "the right age" as we all vary as individuals and our situations and relationships dictate how suitable we are as parents too. But I'm proud to say that at 25 I am married to a man I have been with for seven and a half years,we have two beautiful children and I own my own business. And although I found the initial transition into parent hood intense I think this would have been true at any age; and when I do occasionally go out I have a great time but it's not the same as it was before as I have more important things to think about now. As long as you love your kids and do what you can for them you're a great parent,ALL OF YOU Baby

sammie83sammie83
posted 1 decade 4 years ago

mmmchocolate said:
Very happy i do that when people stop in front of me in town or in the supermarket!


its funny watchin there faces wen u do it, its like...woops sorry.lol, but u have that look on ur face an they know ur not really.... Crazy

KeeleysMumKeeleysMum
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
I have taken offence to your post Cathy. I am very defensive on this subject and i can vouch for a lot of mums that we dont want your Pity. I was 19 when i had my little one, i am engaged and in a very happy relationship. The way you worded your view sounded like the typical stereotype that young mums have to face in public as it is. Young, incapable, living off the state and have thrown their lives away. I was very excited to learn i was going to be a mum. Ive put my career (as a midwife) on hold, i work full time as a carer for elderly and disabled people, i get home and care for keeley, and i still see my friends and family. Ive lost nothing, but gained a daughter. I know you are entitled to your oppinion but i dont want or need pity from anyone and im sure neither do most young mums. Im 110% positive that im a better mum than thousands of people. Being young, im active and enthusiastic and i still have my whole life ahead of me. The only difference is, i have my daughter to keep me smiling when im feeling low.

CathyGCathyG
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
Sorry no offence was intended at all, i can understand that you don't want pity. I just wanted to say that i (as an older mother) don't "look down" on young mums, but feel for you. A lot of young mum i see, look unhappy & are struggling in life, we also see these types of images on TV & in the media, so unfortunately can't help but sterotype. Just like older mothers too get sterotyped as being over the hill, infertile, ball bashing career women etc. To be honest i wish i was a younger mum now, so that i had the energy & enthusiam that you clearly have for your child XXX Love

EvansmumEvansmum
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
I am 22 and have a 10 month old boy and class myself as a young mum. I have never been looked down upon for being young and dont really think that it is a problem where I live as there are so many young mums! The problem around here is that there are so many young people having babies because they think they will get a council house, live off benefits and thats them sorted for the rest of their lives! I feel like I have to explain to people that me and my partner are privately renting and that my OH works so hard, sometimes 7 days a week, just to make ends meet, so they dont think we are scroungers! Im now looking for work aswell as we are struggling! It annoys me so much that my sister in law and her BF dont work,live in a council house and they have 3 kids to support, and have just had a brand new kitchen fitted, all for free. I have one little boy and can barely afford to clothe him! Thats just the way things are around this area tho!

mmmchocolatemmmchocolate
posted 1 decade 4 years ago

Evansmum said:
It annoys me so much that my sister in law and her BF dont work,live in a council house and they have 3 kids to support, and have just had a brand new kitchen fitted, all for free. I have one little boy and can barely afford to clothe him! Thats just the way things are around this area tho!
Tounge Out

that really annoys me, my sister in law does the niether her or hr husband work, despite the fact that both of her children are in school and she has take aways every night and wears expensive clothes etc i am on benefits at the mo but for genuine reasons ive just had my third baby and im on maternity leave from college. my BF left work with depression just before found out i was pregnant, although hes better now he cant get back into work hes not very qualified to do much and has applied for evey job he can, either getting the knock back or no one gets back to him. we get letters and fone calls from the social all the time got to in for back to work interviews etc theyre stopping our money for one reason or other whilst she never haears a word and they never cock up her money like they do ours! it really make my blood boil! Mad

LadybugLadybug
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
I have a pupil with a baby and she seems to be coping ok. I REALLY DO have sympathy for her. (That's allowed, sweeties, it's called emotion)
I would class a young mum as someone who is 16 or under.

CathyGCathyG
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
thanks Ladybug, thought it was just me that showed a little compassion for the young teenage mums. i saw a programme about some 14 yr olds who'd got up the duff from some random guy & were left high & dry. It was heartbreaking, they didn't want their babies & wouldn't feed them, care for them or touch them when they were crying, all they wanted to do was text their mates & go over the park to hang out. It was mortifying, i was so upset watching it. In the end some of babies had to be taken into care, coz the teenage mums couldn't cope. I felt so sorry for them & the poor little mites. Sad Face

kelkel
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
i always feel sorry for young mums coz they are so young ad not lived but i know that 99% of them are just as god at parenting then older mums,.
just a shame they dont live a little before having a baby.
but to all u young mums out there...well done for doing just as good a job as us oldies!!! Very happy Very happy Very happy

LadybugLadybug
posted 1 decade 4 years ago

kel said:
i always feel sorry for young mums coz they are so young ad not lived but i know that 99% of them are just as god at parenting then older mums,.
just a shame they dont live a little before having a baby.
but to all u young mums out there...well done for doing just as good a job as us oldies!!! Very happy Very happy Very happy


Yikesy and well done to all of you who do a better job than us oldies..... (and why not!?) argh - this is a sensitive thread......

mitchmitch
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
i was in morrisons the other day when i heard this kid scream and then i eard this old bid say " god kids today id shoot them all " Shocked Crazy Shocked

just goes to show how times and traditions have changed

JoolsJools
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
Yo CathyG!



Haven't been on this site in ages so i've just noticed this thread. I told them I felt sympathy for young mums - AND THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT.

As I said on JP, it's called 'emotion'. And it is a bloody forum after all - if folks don't like what you say.. well - tough! Forums by their very nature invite people from all walks of life, with different opinions, to have open discussions. If people are gonna get aw ruffled by the debates then they shouldny join them. It's kinda like playing at snowball fights and whining when one flies your way...

Just noticed this on AK site from Ladybug, hope u dont mind Ladybug but i kinda agreex

LadybugLadybug
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
*grabs popcorn, gets big drink, puts up feet and waits*

BedheadBedhead
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
Last edited by Bedhead 1 decade 4 years ago

mitch said:
i was in morrisons the other day when i heard this kid scream and then i eard this old bid say " god kids today id shoot them all " Shocked Crazy Shocked


There's a coincidence, when I see old biddies I quite often think "god, old people today, I'd shoot them" Razz Very happy Razz

alis378alis378
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
I had Andrea the day before my 21st birthday and as I have always looked much younger for my age I used to get a lots people look down their nose at me, especially mums from my street. I used to call them the "pushchair brigade" lol.

I recently went through an experience where I was almost a grandma at the ripe old age of 37!! Andreas baby wasnt meant to be and although that is very sad, I am partly relieved that it didnt happen. Andrea is a very outgoing girl, and although she is excellent with children and will make a very good mum "in time", she likes to do a lot of living and I know that would come very hard for her to have to give that up.

Although I dont look down my nose at young mums (I know what its like to have that happen), I do have sympathy because they are just so tied to their baby (or they should be) and cant have the social life they might otherwise dream off.

I do know of some very good young mums, but nearly all of them regret their life as it is at the moment.

This is a very emotive subject and there are always going to be lots of different views on it but we shouldnt turn against each other on here for voicing opinions you might not agree with.
Kiss

chezchez
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
i feel pregnant with my first daughter when i was 16 she was due on my 17th birthday but was 2 week late and i can honestly say i have never felt trapped or tied down the thought off going out with my friends has never bothered me the way i think is that loving your children and them loving you back and seeing them do there first things and knowing that you have made such a presious thing is FAR more exciting that going out with friends i admitt i do go out and let my hair down every now and then and so does my partner and my mother will look after my children. Alot of people think that young mums cant do a good of a job or give there children as much as older mums can. Well i Know thats a load of rubbish i now have 3 children and am 20 2 of which have got heart problems 1 of which had open heart surgery 11 months ago that was the hardest thing me and my partner have ever been through but we got through it and my daughter is doing brilliant now. The way i see it is even though we are young mothers we are growing up with our kids and they are teaching us and we are teaching them my children teach me something new everyday and im sure yours do its brilliant. I hate the thought of anyone pitying me because i have got the best thing i could ever ask for in life and thats my 3 little girls i couldnt ask for anything more so i dont need pity. NO OFFENCE

bunnigirlbunnigirl
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
well i was 17 when i had my first and i was petrified even though i had childcare training and i have loads of brothers and sisters and nieces and nephews ect and i was still scared i guess thats cos this little person looked up to me for love and help and security and i was the only person that baby had to do this but being young i might have struggled at first who doesnt but in time i learned hoe to do everything i needed and in time i went on to have more children i am no 28 with 4 babies and they great i do sometimes think i missed out but i then think when they have gone off and decided to live their own life i have the chance then to do what i want i wouldnt be without any of my children now even after a hard day lol they are my life i chose to have them and i look after them no matter what age i have been sorry if i have rabbited on a bit lol
xxxx

ButtercupButtercup
posted 1 decade 4 years ago
it doesn`t matter the least to me how old the mum is as long as the children are well looked after. Just because i waited until i was 31 to have Amy doesn`t automatically make me a better mum than someone who is 16 Confused

Being an older mum like me has its good points but also its bad points so who is right?

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