I need some advice asap! :(

I have a 7 year old daughter and she is very very dramatic. She is a great kid and I would say a bit spoiled. Well this is the problem, when she does not get her own way (ie) if I don't allow her cookies b4 supper, she looks at me and tells me that I am abusing her! I try to tell her not to say and take that word so lightly but she views normal saying "no" as not general disipline but she uses the word abuse. Well we live in a very small town and the principal at her school knows that she is just being dramatic and using the word wrong but if she continues she will have to report it, its her job you know?. I need advice and joined this forum for this very reason too. I am a good mom, I have 2 older kids in highschool and I need help to figure out how I can get her to stop using this word. Should I just talk to her when she says it and find a better thing for her to say? Such as Mom you are not being fair? or something like that? Any words of advice to solve this would be most welcomed.

My DD is also 7 and I can have a frank conversation with her because she understands very well what I say. You can do the same. Have you ever told her what would happen if it's reported?? The consequences and so on. I don't like to do that, but in this case, I'd scare her a little bit because that's really serious. Maybe other mum has a better suggestion. xx

Yes the principal and her teacher (they know me well) sat her down and I talked with her last night about it. it happens when she gets frustrated. She just blurbs things out and doesn't think b4 hand. Thank you for that advice. I am going to talk to her tonight about trying other options as well.

oh Pugs! sorry for not coming up with something smart to help you...I'd be lost too!!

That sort of thing can be quite common, we used to tell our parents that we would call childline then one day mum packed us each a bag and was driving into town, then told us we were being dropped off at the local childrens home, bloody worked too.

Yes scare tactics work sometimes eh? Yes i am in canada....accept a Canuck in this forum?

Pugs said:
Yes scare tactics work sometimes eh? Yes i am in canada....accept a Canuck in this forum?

Of course we will accept a Canadian in our forum. We have mnay members from afar (USA and Australia)

Welcome to JP

I think the others have said what I would so no point in me posting again. Scare tactics are good.

Welcome to JP Pugs! I think you've been given great advise here... I've been in similiar situation with my now 6 year old... she used to tell people I put her in the dog's crate to sleep when she was a baby LOL... I obviously did not, but I had to explain to her that if she says that to people that don't know us they might believe her and that kids can be taken away from their parents for things like that... by the way, I think the whole "sleeping in the crate thing" stemmed from a picture that was taken when she was about 2 yrs old of her after she had crawled in to my dog's crate when we were visiting and stayin with my sister LOL

Thanks for your replies on this!

Well just like the crate thing, my hubby and I joke around alot! Once when my hubby was telling her to brush her teeth and go get changed for bed, she said but daddy! I want to play more and I said ahh Honey quit abusing her...we all laughed and thought it was funny, but now my daughter brings it up..I think it stems from that. Just proves how much kids listen lol!
I hope it all gets sorted out, i really do..i talked with her yesterday and she understands but I am just going to take it one day at a time. I told her to choose her words wisely and use them when appropriate.

I would just tell her that if she uses the word abuse one more time then you will report her to the police because thats a naughty word and she shouldnt use it.

It might make her think twice before using it again

Lucy said:
I would just tell her that if she uses the word abuse one more time then you will report her to the police because thats a naughty word and she shouldnt use it.

It might make her think twice before using it again

Trouble is that then you are in danger of scaring her if she really needs it oneday - the boy who cried wolf is a good one. Maybe if you have access to footage etc of children who have been abused (not nice subject matter ) or access to a children's home, and then maybe the reality of what she is saying will start to hit home........

Thats something the principal of her school said to do. Get pics of abused kids..not a good subject matter but maybe it will help. I just might have to do that in the future.

My preference would not be to use scare tactics with her but see if you can encourage her to use other words to express how she feels when you make a boundary with something. This encourages her to begin to identify with what's going on for her when she can't have something and moves the focus away from the specific words being used. Providing the school are aware of your situation, which you say, they are, there should be no risk there!
I'm interested that you say she is spoiled, how is she spoiled and what do you do that spoils her? Hope this is helpful... Ben