Picked baby up without supporting head!

I had the health visitor round for the first time yesterday afternoon. She didn't impress me by being 30 minutes late and offering no apology. She's also (and I don't mean this to sound rude) quite old and is 'keeping her hand in' at the local hospital she told us. She was helping out as the health visitors are understaffed at the moment.

Anyway, she picked Sophie up from the floor after measuring her length just by putting her hands under her armpits and up to her shoulders. She offered NO support to her neck. I immediately lunged forward and went to support her neck and said "you're not supporting her head properly". She turned, calm as a cucumber, and said babies are a lot stronger than they look and you don't need to support their head every time you pick them up. I said that why was it then that every book said "support their head and neck". She said people are over cautious and she probably handles babies differently as she's been doing it for absolutely years

I am really not impressed by her attitude and can't believe every book and website says support head/neck for no apparent reason

She has made an appointment to come back and do a hearing test. I am wondering if I should call the health visitors and ask that I do not have her again as I am quite worried about her handling Sophie. I know for the hearing test they don't pick the baby up as they need them to be asleep but I don't want her to become my 'regular' health visitor!!

She has really pis d me off. There certainly doesn't seem to be any damage to Sophie's head/neck and she held her own head up quite well but I'm concerned about why she handled her that way.

Has anyone else had a midwife or health visitor pick up a baby without supporting their head?

Hi hun, firstly let me say i know just how you feel. I hate it when HV think they knoe best just because they are health visitors. I nearly threw my HV out after i had Lauren she was so rude and when mike came home from work i was in tears because of it. If you aren't comfortable having her back to see you then i would definitely ask not to see her again. I don't really think it is acceptable sending someone out who's 'helping out' anyway! As for the head handling, i know a few who pick them up in this way, usually though as they pick them up under their arms they have their fingers curled sort of up above their shoulders at the back so their head can't actually flop back (i hope that makes sense?) I do think as they handle babies all the time they forget how nervous our mums are about our babies. When i had lauren (by c-section) they lifted her out of me and held her up above the sheet i had infront of me so i couldn't see the operation happening by her feet I was really shocked by that? However, she wasn't injured in any way. I'm not sure if this is ok or not to be honest? In my opinion the most important thing is that you feel you have a HV who is able to support you and answer any questions you have in a way you are comfortable with. We need to feel supported not worried to let them in our house for fear of what they will say or do. So ring them hun, hopefully you will get a much better HV for your next visit! Xx

Thanks for the advice hun.

Do you know, it's bugged me so much that today I've just phoned the community midwives at the hospital to check on how to pick a baby up. The lady I spoke to said she does pick babies up under their armpits but her fingertips are supporting their neck/back (as you described).

She suggested, as you have done hun, to speak to the practice manager at my GPs on Monday and say I don't want this lady round again.

Sophie is fine but I'm so irritated about it today. I really don't want that HV back as I do not trust her around Sophie

Don't upset the Mumminator!!

Awww I would feel exactly the same way When Aaralyn was in the hospital the first time with pnemonia there was a nurse who was very gruff and kind of yelled at her when they were trying to get the IV in her. I was really p'd off and I told one of the other nurses that I didn't want her around my baby..... as it turned out, by the end of her week stay there I actually ended up really liking that nurse (that I didn't at first).....

I don't like the idea of having some one who is just "helping out" coming around as your HV either, especially after the first impression of her.... I hope it works out so that someone else comes for you guys!

Hehehehehe i love that, Mumminator ROFL!

I think you are definitely doing the right thing hun. She sounds very rude and full of self-importance if you ask me. However she handled sophie, i wouldn't be happy having her back anyway! Am glad Sophie ok though hun, sounds like you are doing a great job! Xx

I'd be unhappy about it too, just because she's been doing the job for years doesn't mean she should be careless and sloppy with her approach. She should treat every baby as if it were her first ever hands on job.

I used to pick Joseph up under his arms but supporting his head with my fingers are at the back but his head was always supported.

As for the 'HV' I would phone the GP surgery on Monday and explain that you don't want her back. A HV is a really important person in yours and Sophie's life and you need to get on and be able to respect her.

im sorry but what an awful woman. i wouldnt let her in my house again, nevermind near my baby! youre doing the right thing by calling and asking not to have her again.

i can understand where you are coming from with bad health visitors i havent seen my HV since july 2007 when she came round to my house and spent an hour criticising every aspect of my life outside of izzy and telling me everything i was doing with izzy was wrong and that all started was becuase i told her i had been taken of anti depressants as they were making me worse.

i would contact the people that deal with health visitors and ask not to see that health visitor again you have to be happy with them otherwise neither you or sophie will get the benefits

We do the back/armpit pick up, it does support the head even though it doesn't look like it. I generally don't like health visitors, how ever they treat you, it just seems like an invasion into your family really. We had one for a very long time for Jamie as he was premature and had quite a few health problems, his health visits only stopped three months before Pippa arrived.

I used to pick my 2 up by the armpits and support their necks with my fingers, but they both were very strong babies, but I only did it when I knew they had strong muscles (both of them would lift their heads up on their own straight after they were born). I would never do this with a baby I'd only just met!!!

I'm don't really like HV's and if I've ever had a problem they always refer you to a GP anyway. I had a horrible one once with George, I only ever went if they needed to have a development check. If I have any concerns health wise I take them to the GP.