what would you do?

hi everyone i really not sure what to do? im woking as a care assistant it was agreed at interview that i wouldnt do weekends but now they putting me down to work them , my hubby-2-be has to work weekends so i have the 4 0r 5 kids (5 when we have his daughter lol) im currently doing 930 - 230 in the week, yesterday i wasnt hapy going in from 2pm till 10pm but i still went and i have to travel 20 miles there and back it also makes it difficult because alot of the staff know my family and im having to be very careful what i say and feel as if i dont really fit in

my hubby-2-be says i dont have to work if i dont want to and my mother is backing him my youngest started school in september and i dont want to feel like im depending on him finacially ,

what would you do?

If it were me and I was in a financial situation of being able to afford it I would be a stay at home mom in a heart beat (10 years ago I would have never thought I would want that!)

I would busy my self with volunteering when I could with the school and such.... Honestly at this point in my life and with Aaralyn still sick all the time it would be a dream to be able to not work right now..... dream on Tammy

I guess it really all comes down to what you want to do and it sounds like you're not really super happy with that job

i enjoy the work i do, and it nice to have money at the end of the month, but i dont know what to do i can see hubby-2-be point but even so i guess im scared of being seen as a failure ? this is upsetting me cos i really dont know what to do bless him , hes given me a life back as i wasnt allowed to work, with my ex (control freak )but if im honest i cant work in a place where it seems like my mum (bless her) is watching over my shoulder..........

Why don't you look for something else part-time somewhere else hun? If you enjoy working and earning some money for yourself, i'm sure you do a huge amount looking after the house and kids already though hun so don't beat yourself up about being a stay-at-home mum if that is what you want and can afford though! Life is short enough without you having to stay somewhere you don't like if you don't have too. Have you tried asking why they have changed your hours to include evenings and weekends hun? Maybe they don't realise the issues you have with it? Xx

they are fully aware of the issues i have with child care as i have only been there 4 weeks and ive already had to remind them i cant do weekends , maybe our right i should try somewhere where my family arent hanging over me lol

I believe one parent should always be home, so I would say don't work.

At the end of the day you did the correct thing and raised your requirement to not work weekends at the interview stage. They should honour this as it was discussed upfront and agreed upon.

Are the people trying to get you to work weekends the same people that were at the interview and agreed this point? Did you get anything in writing about it?

The other thing is to look at a compromise with them if they are going to insist on you working weekends. Perhaps you can agree to work one in four.

Talk to your employer again, and make sure that they are clear what pressure they are putting you under. If you like the job then it is worth trying to resolve the problems.

With regards to you working or not, as it sounds like it is not required financially for you. My thoughts would be do it if you want to. It will give you a life outside of being a mum and that will help with self esteem and so on, and you also have a little money to spoil yourself with. Working 0930-1430 means that it doesn't affect the kids either as they are at school.

thanks for all you comments since then i have had a week off due to a stomach bug and informed them daily and on wednesday i received a letter saying i was sacked! she claims i didnt do my agreed hours , (16) i was doing 20 - 25 hours plus and yesterday recievd my p45, i wouldnt mind so much but considering i was doing more than my agreed plus weekends i think she got abit of a cheek