feelings of our older children

d o you ever worry about how the older child really feels when a new baby comes along?

Older children still need one on one time with you or they feel like they are playing second fiddle. Often they will start acting like a baby for your attention if all you concentrate on is the baby. Eve if you try to involve he older sibling with the baby. If you spread out the attention then there will be less of a chance that there will be intense sibling rivalry.
This doesn't mean you should go over board. Each child should have their own toys and own space if possible. It's unrealistic to expect them to share EVERYTHING.
Though, siblings do tend to develop better sharing and social skills than single children and they can develop better child care skills for babysitting.

I must admit i do. Georgia-Mae will be 5 when bump arrives and although at the moment she couldn't be any more excited i know we are really going to have to make sure we have one on one time with her.

She ghas changed her mind to what she wants though - it was a girl but now it's a boy - i've a feeling that is somethign to do with hsaring toys....

I think we all worry about how our older children will react when we have a new baby.

Jas is almost 10 now and is very excited. However, I am fully aware that we still need to do things separately together as well as a family. Mike, my other half, fully understands that he will need to literally be left holding the baby whilst Jas and I do stuff together, such as shopping or riding.

She is old enough to be helpful to me with a new baby too but also at the age where she is growing up and loves time with mum alone.

It's a balancing act.

We have bought Jas a present from the baby to give her when she's born and she has also been buying presents for the baby from her pocket money (which of course we top up again ).

I think the key is getting them involved but also appreciating they will need some 'one-to-one' time if you can manage it

I totally agree that each child needs one on one time.I take Vic once a week to his swimming lesson then out for lunch/movie or just to the park for a few hours he loves it and has never shown an inch of resentment towards his little brother.

kristag said:
I think we all worry about how our older children will react when we have a new baby.

Jas is almost 10 now and is very excited. However, I am fully aware that we still need to do things separately together as well as a family. Mike, my other half, fully understands that he will need to literally be left holding the baby whilst Jas and I do stuff together, such as shopping or riding.

She is old enough to be helpful to me with a new baby too but also at the age where she is growing up and loves time with mum alone.

It's a balancing act.

We have bought Jas a present from the baby to give her when she's born and she has also been buying presents for the baby from her pocket money (which of course we top up again ).

I think the key is getting them involved but also appreciating they will need some 'one-to-one' time if you can manage it

This is exactly what we did with step DD who was 10 when Georgia-Mae arrived x

What I do is if Summer and I ever pop to town or down to the shop or something and Denis stays at home with Steve I make a point of saying to her "It's nice just us girlies isn't it" and now she will say it when it's just the two of us. Obviously I get time alone with Den while Summer's at school. Also Steve will sometimes take Summer with him if he has to pop out somewhere so they get time together.
I do find it hard sometimes, trying to make sure I give equal discipline and equal praise.