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My sister needs help shes a compulsive liar.

posted 1 decade 5 years ago
I just wondered if anyone could help advise me on what sort of help if any we could get her.

sorry its a bit of a long story.

Her name is and and she is 17 and always has to be the center of attention and has always been jelous of me and my children and my brother. I fell out with her nearly a year ago because i lost a baby and had quiet a difficult time and was just getting myself back to normal when she came home(to my mums house)crying one day saying she had miscarried we was all there for her but two weeks later again she came home saying she had had yet another miscarriage i knew this wasnt possible so i kept my distance but my mother comforted her then 12 days after again she miscarried so it was now 3 times in less than a month. I knew she was lying and was really angry when one day she came to my house talking about the "so called" miscarriages she seemed really happy about talking about them i asked her how she found out she was miscarrying and she told me she explained to the doctor how she was bleeding and he had told her that there was no doubt about it she was miscarrying each time. I told her i didnt belive that as she hadnt once been examined or had a scan or even a positive test and you cant miscarry 3 times in one month she argued with me and said you can then left. After that she started to try and turn everyone against me saying i was a bad mother and that i neglect my children but everyone who knows me knows my life is my children so she didnt get very far so she then got in touch with social services they came to my house and said that they belive it was a milisious call and i am a very good mother and left. I was furious by the fact my own sister has done this to me and my family but kept calm because i didnt want my babies being affected by her and i knew i was not the only person she has done this to.
Since them three miscarriages there has been at least 1-2 every month she is constantly out sleeping around not using protection then saying she is pregnant it seems as if she just wants the attention and to trap every man she sleeps with.
3 weeks ago she sleep with a lad the day after she was claiming she had morning sickness and thought she was pregnant last week she told my mum she was 2 weeks pregnant and had cravings and everything my mum bought a test and told her to do it this was an hour after her "so called" positive test but this one was completly negative since then she has convinced the whole of the family, neighbours and friends that she is pregnant and that she has bad cravings and apparently cannot fit into any of her clothes and that she is getting fluttering in her belly. I just cant understand how everyone can belive this.
She seems to do this each time then has her so called miscarriage. She seems obbsessed with being pregnant she once even stole my scan photo cut my name of and told people that it was her babies scan photo untill i found out.

I really do think she needs some sort of help but she has a councelor but they dont help her because she goes there and does nothing but lie and makes out her life is so hard and she has things bad when really she does nothing and has everyone rallying around after her. Its as if she always has to have a star role in a drama scene.

Please if anyone has any advice on what help we could get could you let me know because she is tareing the whole family apart.
thanks for taking the time to read.

posted 1 decade 5 years ago
I'm partly only child. i have half brothers that never lived with me so I can't give you a professional or experienced answer. But, i'm guessing this is sibling rivalry of the third kind. She is jealous and resentful and very selfish. i think a good family meeting and an agreement fot he whole family to get into counselling is a good idea. She sounds like a neglected soul who has lost comfort and security within the family. Children who are much much younger act like babies when their is another baby in the family, especially when they aren't getting the attention they used to. Your sister is too old for that and so feels the need to steal the spotlight by making up stories of having miscarraiges bacause its the only way she can say that she's having babies without proving they exist to the family. Therefore still bringing all eyes on her. It's sad and pathetic and i'm sure your family is not ammused either. she needs help in the worst way.

posted 1 decade 5 years ago
I think that there is usually someone in the family that spoil things. She obviously feels that these lies will get her attention, and now they're not working on you, she's turne against you. I'm pretty sure that the rest of the family must realise something isn't right, and surely they don't think much to her apparent lose morrals if she is apparently becoming pregnant every other week!! Maybe you should ask her when they are going to look into why she is miscarying...I know after 3 miscaraiges they start to investigate what causes them, see what you get from that.

Have you spoken to your mum about it? Explain that she has even tried to call social services against you?

It sounds like she does have some sort of problem, either that she has a lot of jealousy or that she has some deeper problems. I only have brothers, and to be honest its not very often I see them anymore, but my hubby has sisters, and I know one caused trouble in her teen years.

posted 1 decade 5 years ago
It does sound as though she is a very jealous young lady. I think she feels you have a great life and is desperate for what you have. Therefor her trying to get pregnant and having supposed miscarriages every other week.

I would also speak to your mum and see if she has any ideas. I'm sure she doesn't believe everything she is saying as apart from anything else your mum has obviously had at least 2 children herself and knows that most of what she is claiming isn't possible. I imagine your mum just thinks it may be best/easier to just go along with it to not cause trouble? I also think family counselling may be a good idea. She is obviously one very mixed up young lady and i'm sure she doesn't mean to cause the upset she is causing she just can't control her feelings at the moment. This must be awful for you, especially when social services turned up on your doorstep. You must have felt very betrayed. Just try and see her as someone that needs help and not your sister being nasty. I really hope you can get this sorted hun Kiss

posted 1 decade 5 years ago
she sounds very mixed up and could do with some help, i hope she gets it, she also needs to have some advice about STIs

posted 1 decade 5 years ago
candgsmum Have you spoken to your mum about it? Explain that she has even tried to call social services against you?
hi i speak to my mum about her alot but she just seems to sit back and go along with her i asked her why but she says it saves trouble and if she does say something emma doesnt like she will cause as much trouble as she can she has put my mum through hell and back but my mum still sticks by her she has had people set her cars on fire in the past and set fireworks of at her house and beat my brother up the list goes on and on emma really is evil. We are just at our wicks end.

thankyou all for your replies i am going to sit my mum down and let her read them and see what she would like to sort out because we cant keep living like this.
It was my mums 40th birthday yeasterday and i tried to make it as speacial as possible but 90 percent of the day emma was on the phone making out as if she is having an ectopic pregnancy my mum got really worried and upset then last night when she spoke to emma again she was fine. Again it was just another way of getting to be center of attention. Sad Face

posted 1 decade 5 years ago
This situations sounds very similar to one that I have experienced where i've previously worked. In that case the girl ended up being HIV positive by 19. Through therapy she is dealing with her issues that caused her to be a HUGE liar she has been diagnosed with a mental illness.

Personally though when I have had counselling it took me 5 counsellors before I found someone that I could work with.

Hope u can stay strong.

Huge Hugs to you all Tams

posted 1 decade 2 years ago
You need to talk to your mom and tell her that she has been lying all along. Back it up with proofs that it is impossible to miscarry 3 times in a month. Your sister clearly wants attention and will do anything to get. I have read in an article that they might have been lying because they want to hide their insecurities so talk to her again. Reason with her that what she has been doing is wrong and that it is tearing your family apart.

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