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Candra's invisible friend creeping me out!!!!

glowingsunglowingsun
posted 9 years 8 months ago
Candra has or had a pretend friend back in our old place and I've been having doubts about how pretend this friend is. The invisible little troublemaker's name is Suzy. I call this thing a troublemaker because Candra brings up excuses to get out of chores and responsibilies and this Suzy tells her she doesn't have to listen to me. It's all "Suzy says this, Suzy says that". so I tell Candra that Suzy is not always right and that she has to listen to mommy. What makes me believe Suzy is more real is the way Candra looks away when people talk to her. This was brought up at meeting with her teacher. You'll be talking and she'll have this distracted look on her face as if she's paying attention to someone else more interesting. Suzy is now not with Candra. She told me that Suzy was left behind at the old building and was very upset about it.
We are very spiritual family. Candra's seen spirits before through out her life. But the effects of this invisible friend is at my wits end. HELP!!!!!! Scared


RichRich Moderator
posted 9 years 8 months ago
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imaginary_friend

And also this..

Many parents will be familiar with the sound of mutterings coming from their child’s bedroom. If they ask them who they are talking to, the response will usually be: “Nobody!” Studies researching the phenomena of childhood imaginary friends have found that if a parent asks too many questions about the invisible companion or, worse still, tries to interact with them, the friend disappears as miraculously as it arrived. So, when you hear your child chattering away into thin air, it is best not to intervene. It is in the interest of your child’s healthy development to keep their make-believe mate alive, and here’s why…
Taking control

Imaginary friends give children the refreshing opportunity to tell someone else what to do. Their invisible friend behaves exactly the way they want them to. Your child can be the tallest, fastest or prettiest and is always the winner of the pair.
Wishful thinking

When it comes to an object of desire, some children fulfil their wish by invention. Children quite commonly invent a family pet or can be heard talking to Spiderman or Snow White in their bedroom.
Beat the bully

Made-up mates can be a useful for boosting confidence, which in turn can help a child stand up to bullies.
Break the boredom

Children with imaginary friends are much less likely to be bored. Make-believe mates demonstrate an ability to be creative with spare time.
Voice concern

Some children use their imaginary friend to convey a message they feel unable to say themselves, such as: “Parsley the Sheep doesn’t like it when you are cross, Daddy”.
All mine

An imaginary friend belongs to the person who invents it and no one else. It does not have to be shared with friends or family.
Shy away

Fantasy friends are far from a poor replacement for real friends. Research reveals that children with imaginary friends are less inclined to be shy and are more popular.
Baby blues

Imaginary friends are particularly common among children with newborn siblings. It is thought that the conjured-up companion provides comfort and replaces any lost parental attention.
Practice makes perfect

A fantasy friend can give a child the perfect opportunity to practice something they want to say to someone in reality. It also gives them the chance to practice their verbal skills, which is why children with imaginary friends tend to be more articulate.
Missing Persons

Children with absent family members or lost friends will often reinvent the person in invisible form as a healthy coping mechanism. It is quite common for a child to interact in their imagination with a close companion who has recently left school or a deceased grandparent.
Second helpings

An invisible friend can be a sneaky means of getting an extra portion of food – “Sleeping Beauty would also like some chocolate ice cream, Mum.” Followed by – “I ate Beauty's scoop because she wouldn’t wake up.” Imaginary friends of this kind not only suggest a propensity for creativity but also indicate that you have a clever clogs on your hands!
Imaginary enemies

Somewhat surprisingly, imaginary enemies have also been found to be a healthy coping mechanism. Children may invent someone to thrash out a dispute they are having at school. Research has shown that children with imaginary enemies are more able to manage their anger and understand individual differences.
Naughty friends

Some particularly resourceful children find that an invisible chum can be a handy scapegoat – “It was Bob who spilt the juice on your keyboard, it wasn't me” they protest, pointing at thin air.
To your advantage

Whilst a parent should never try to alter their child's imaginary friend, there's no harm into turning his or her's existence to your advantage. You could try: "Oh look, Mr Incredible has eaten all his veg" or "Why don't you have a race with Tinkerbell to see who can get dressed first?"

glowingsunglowingsun
posted 9 years 8 months ago
i agree with a lot you said. Candra isn't very shy at all. She does like to be the one who wins and prefers to play alone than with kids.
I just wanna add this one thing I forgot. Sometimes I'll hear an older women's or a different voice taking to her. I'm not really freaked out by her invisible friend, just fascinated. I had a few at a time when I was her age.
there has been times when she was a toddler she'd see ghosts of animals. Once we were downtown and she told me she saw a horse in front of us. She was pointng and following her fingers with what she saw.
Anyways, thank you for the insight.

hapydazyhapydazy Moderator
posted 9 years 8 months ago
That was great Rich! Very interesting and makes alot of sense. Makes me feel better about Aaralyn's "imaginary" friends!

Glowingsun, I've often wondered the same things about Aaralyn that you do about Candra... it's funny she does the same thing when people are talking to her alot, looking off blankly into space which has had me concerned about possible ADD. Have you ever done any reading about the Indigo or Crystal Children? Do some googling on that, it's very interesting....

glowingsunglowingsun
posted 9 years 8 months ago
I have heard about indigo and crystal children. I haven't really considered that to the case because not all the symptoms added up with her. I read that crystal or indigo kids start talking at a later age and Candra was developing at a normal rate when she was a baby. When she was about 21/2 ahe started getting behind in her developments and had problems wt=ith siezure like fits. (I can't confirm they were siezures because she was not diagnosed as epileptic and were not witnessed by her doctor.)
Her dad has ADD and the everyone who works with her are looking out for those signs. My mom has dyslexia and we're lookingout for that, too.
I just get a very special feeling about her, like she just knows something nobody else knows. Dads side of the family (whom I don't get to see very often)even said they noticed that about her when they saw her last. She just gets this mischevious look in her eyes. Sometimes it makes me shiver because she'll just be staring at you. Or she''l sneak around so quietly you don't know she's there. She has almost given me a few heart attacks.
There probably is a logical reason for her behaviour that hasn't been determined yet. But in way I feel as though science is putting medical terms for anything they can't fully explain just to sound like they know everything about anything. Like there is no room for extrodinary abilities or unexplained phenomena. if Candra hasa gift to see and hear people on the otherside, I don't want to scare her or tell her she's being rediculous. But I'm afraid those effects of rationalism are already taking it's toll.

candgsmumcandgsmum
posted 9 years 8 months ago
That was really interesting Rich thank you Thumbs Up

Charlotte is becoming very imaginative at the moment, a lot of role playing, and a lot of it now makes sense.

Unfortunately for George he must be the tangible naughty friend, as he seems to be getting the blame for anything Charlotte does wrong at the moment. He is also is the one that 'asks' for something like a biscuit or pudding LOL...even though it's Charlotte that wants it Rolling Eyes

She used to be quite creepy sometimes, but as she's got older, that seems to have wore off.

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