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Siblings Fighting/Teasing

posted 1 decade 5 years ago
My son Adonis, he's 10, has begun teasing his younger brother, Liem. Liem is 9. Liem often reacts by lashing out in some way and of course if Liem hits or pushes Adonis then Adonis will do the same back. They are both about the same size so neither seems to have an advantage there.

It seems to happen mostly at day care. The only thing I've been able to think of is to let them both know that until they can stop then Liem will not be able to walk home from school this school year. I am going to phase Adonis out of day care when school starts and he will walk home and be with his older brother Willem. Willem and Adonis get along fine together and so I don't expect problems with those two being home until I get home from work.

Willem stopped going to day care last year once he turned 12.

All my children want to stop going to day care and I agree it has mostly outlasted its usefulness but they can't all be home before and after school without me being there so I don't have any other option right now. I am hoping Liem will find a way to stop the fighting and teasing because if he does he will not have to go to day care after school.

This just started sometime around the beginning of summer and I don't know for sure what changed. I have spoken to both Adonis and Liem and plan to again. I am hoping some of you have said or done something that helped your children to fight/tease less.

What more do you think I can do to help my children not fight and tease each other so much? It might be enough if I can figure out what to tell Liem so that he can react differently and perhaps that will keep things from escalating.

posted 1 decade 5 years ago
I'm afraid my two fight and they are only 4 and 2. The only way I find to get them to stop is to split them up for a short while and let them have some time alone and calm down.

With it being summer they are not getting a break from each other and winding each other up? Maybe talk to Liem and tell him he needs to ignore adonis teasing him, by walking away and not rising to his taunts, hopefully then Adonis will get tired of teasing Liem.

posted 1 decade 5 years ago
Hmm, I didn't think that it would be they were not getting enough of a break from each other. Probably because they did fine last summer and the fact that I didn't see why this summer should be any different but of course it is because they are each a year older.

I know I have tried to tell him to ignore Adonis but I don't remember if I told him to just walk somewhere else. I will include that in the next conversation I have with him on the subject. Thanks!

posted 1 decade 5 years ago
i am afraid to break this to you but teasing is part of sibling rivelry. It happens sometimes more sometimes less it is almost a natural occurance me and my siblings were at it constantly.

Sorry no ideas on how to calm it down as i havent got to this stage yet withj my girls but it will happen soon

posted 1 decade 5 years ago
- My blog
my girls cannot stand each other. jami is 12 and catherine is 5 and they bicker and tease constantly. its very sad to see as i thought jami might mother catherine but instead she hates her. the only way i can solve it is to split them up.

posted 1 decade 5 years ago
The thing that got me worried about this is that the frequency of the teasing and fighting has increased a lot and it seems to have started this summer and so I am hoping to find a way to reduce it.

I realize it is asking a lot to think I can eliminate the teasing and fighting. However, I hope and believe that I can do or say things that will help them choose to do it less and get along better more often.

I thank you all for speaking your mind as I know I am often naive or simply don't see things and then when I explain them and you comment about what I have written then I see what I should have seen.

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