Ok, for the last 4 1/2 years I've never had a problem with her dad paying child support or seeing her on a regular basis, but I'm really seeing now that he thinks that being a good father is paying $75.00 a week and seeing her for an average of 8 hours a week, with the exceptional over night once or twice a month, and nothing else! He thinks that's where it stops on his part of responsibility.
For 3 years when I worked at Dunkin Donuts Aaralyn had a problem with her white blood cells (no aids or cancer, thank God) but she was constantly sick, in the hospital twice for a week at a time with pneumonia by the time she was 3, got every single virus that went into her school... sum it up, I missed a lot of work due to her not being able to go to school. Not once would he take a day from work or miss a class so that I could go to work and make money (no pay no work). My boss was understanding but all the utilities companies (gas, electric) were not understanding when I couldn't pay the bills. Last October I had my gas heat and hot water turned off because I couldn't the bill. Did he help out and give a little extra over what he normally pays me considering it got shut off because I was missing pay because OUR daughter was sick all the time? NO!
We had to use space heaters and take showers and baths at my boyfriends and my friends house until February when I got my tax money and could pay the bill. On top of other stress, this sent me into a bad depression and I got written out of work but I did get pay while on medical leave. I then decided to not go back to Dunkin Donuts (later was told they didn't have an open shift for me anyway, when I was written back to work) and pursue a better job (as ya'll know
K, now I have the perfect job to start the end of next month but I have to work every other saturday. Mind you, I've been working around Scott's (her dad) schedule of schooling and work so that he could see her when it was convenient for him. He is starting school full time in September a little far away from where he lives (he'll still commute) so he will not be seeing her during the week at all starting in September. Ok I figure, maybe we can do the every other weekend thing and then he can see her when he wants in between. I tell him about the job, how I have to work every other Saturday and could we work out something so that he has her every other saturday, or weekend even. The response was not, I'll think about it, not, let me see what I can maybe work out, but a big fat NO I won't be able to do that that so there's no point in discussing it he says!
I just want to ask you guys, am I nervy or do I have a right to ask this of him. I will say this, as of yet we've never gone to court but I know that's what it's come to now, he needs to have a judge tell him when he should see his daughter and I just never wanted it to come to that. I just wished we could work it out amongst ourselves, but doesnt' seem that way any more. My friend's have been telling me since Aaralyn was born that I've been letting him walk on me, but I just didn't want confrontation and I know he loves Aaralyn, I just didn't want to annoy him so that he would not want to come around to see his daughter.
There was more to the argument and I kept saying I didn't want to do this in front of Aaralyn and he kept on (this was when he dropped her back off to me). when she came in she asked me why I was so upset with Daddy and why did he make me sad. How was I supposed to answer her, I wanted to say cuz your Dad is a selfish son of a... but I won't do that. I told her why just had a disagreement and that it was ok.