WHAT HAVE I DONE!!

i went out last night with some friend, we was havin a brill night.until i cheated on my fiance. omg what have i done. the trouble is i dont remember what happened most of the night, apparently we wen to solihull after coleshill but i dont remember gettin a taxi or even being in solihul. i have never been that drunk that i cant remember. i have drank a lot more in 1 night than what i drank last night and still able to remember. i remember sitting on a bench and then im suddenly with this guy, i dont know where he come from. i dont remember anythin apart from "being with him"
this is not me, i have never cheated on any1 til now. i cant stop cryin i feel so dirty i have had 3 showers today but its not made a difference.
i told my fiance when i got in at 4.30am, he was obviously distraught. i broke his heart, broken his trust in me. after talking today i explained everythin to him and he thinks my drink was spiked. there is just too many missing pieces from the night.
i keep telling him how sorry i am, i cant tel him enough. after a long talk he said we will get thru it , an he loves me too much to just walk away now. but i cant stop cryin, im cryin as im typin now. i have always been a person who hates ppl who cheat.(sorry if that offends anyone) i have always said if u cheat there is no love in the relationship, but now i know thats not true because i love him more than anythin in this world. i cant believe i did it, cant believe i hurt him..i hurt him soooo bad

Do you think that your fiance could be right about you being spiked? It sounds to me like you could have been. If you think that could be it I would call the police, they will be able to do a blood test (I think). I'm sure that you will get through this, he obviously loves you very much, and wether your drink was spiked or not you obviously never meant to do this. Kerry xx

Bedhead said:
Do you think that your fiance could be right about you being spiked? It sounds to me like you could have been. If you think that could be it I would call the police, they will be able to do a blood test (I think). I'm sure that you will get through this, he obviously loves you very much, and wether your drink was spiked or not you obviously never meant to do this. Kerry xx

thats what he said to me. u can get a blood test, might sound stupid but if it turns out my drink WAS NOT spiked then that would mean that i had some sort of control, if t was then i had no control at all. im just annoyed because i remember the thing i'd rather not but then i cant remember the thing i want to remember. i just dont know. ffs i wanna stop cryin but i cant.

yeah i think something not quite rite hear by what ur saying if u have been spiked wud show in yr blood for 48 hrs maybe worth a quick check out if not just put it down too alcohol because it is very apperant u love him and wudnt do a thing like that ...and u been honest with him dont worry hun if he loves u too he will support u just give him time (hard to take in etc)

I'd def get the blood test done.

At least you told your fiance straight away, that isn't the action of someone who intended something to happen.

Sending you lots of ((((((big hugs)))))).

Don't beat yourself up.

xxx

Oh hunni, you poor thing. My first thought that came in my head was that your drink has been spiked. I would definitely get that blood test done. I'm assuming that if that came back positive then being with this other man may not have been consensual.

I think the fact you told your DP straight away would also tell him that you didnt mean to do it - I hope that you can both put this behind you and move on with lessons learnt.

take care
x

hi hunni if you think you have had your drink spiked i would contact the police and get a blood test done coz there is alot of the date rape drug going around or even if it was another drug it could happen to someone else that could end up very ill.

This may be a strange question, but...what exactly do you remember? and what do you regard as cheating on him?...if you can't remember the details, maybe, just maybe nothing major happened. I am of course speculating, and if memory loss has occured then it does indeed sound like a spiking occured, as you had previously stated you have drunk alot more and been in total control. Did you sleep with this guy? or was it more of a getting off with him kind of deal. Sorry to ask these questions, but I am trying to build up a picture of what exactly you remember.

As for your relationship, I am sure your partner realises this is totally out of character on your part, and he must know you inside out practically...so you will get through this, try and recall exactly what happened and talk it through with him...he sounds like a diamond to me, and I am sure he will be fully supportive of you. I would go and get a test done to see if you have had anything untoward slipped into your drink, for your own peace of mind if nothing else. You might otherwise always wonder what the hell happened that night if you don't know for sure...

Keep us updated hun, and don't beat yourself up over it...it's not going to do you any good.

Rich said:
This may be a strange question, but...what exactly do you remember? and what do you regard as cheating on him?...if you can't remember the details, maybe, just maybe nothing major happened. I am of course speculating, and if memory loss has occured then it does indeed sound like a spiking occured, as you had previously stated you have drunk alot more and been in total control. Did you sleep with this guy? or was it more of a getting off with him kind of deal. Sorry to ask these questions, but I am trying to build up a picture of what exactly you remember.

As for your relationship, I am sure your partner realises this is totally out of character on your part, and he must know you inside out practically...so you will get through this, try and recall exactly what happened and talk it through with him...he sounds like a diamond to me, and I am sure he will be fully supportive of you. I would go and get a test done to see if you have had anything untoward slipped into your drink, for your own peace of mind if nothing else. You might otherwise always wonder what the hell happened that night if you don't know for sure...

Keep us updated hun, and don't beat yourself up over it...it's not going to do you any good.

all i remember is sitting on a bench on my own outside somewhere. i presume it was solihull but i cant remember getting there. an the next this im sittin on a wall an this guy was givin me oral and then suddenly we were havin sex. he never finished because i realised what we were doing. an walked away. i remember him following me an i said phone me a taxi, so he did an while we were waitin he said to me u give the best b,j's every. i was like wtf u on a bout...i seriously dont remember doin that. something is not right there is too much missing, i just cant piece it up, i wanna know exactly wat happend but i cant

Sammie, please got to the police. This just doesn't sound right. Normally when you have alcohol induced memory loss (or at least when I do) you remember stuff once you have been reminded of what happened. This really sounds to me like your drink was spiked. Where were your friends? can they shed any light on what happened? Kerry

Bedhead said:
Sammie, please got to the police. This just doesn't sound right. Normally when you have alcohol induced memory loss (or at least when I do) you remember stuff once you have been reminded of what happened. This really sounds to me like your drink was spiked. Where were your friends? can they shed any light on what happened? Kerry

i dont know where they were, my mate paul phoned yesterday an said h left me on the stairs while he went to find amy, an emma, but again i dont remember, i havent told them about any of this i would rather them not know. lets just say a particular person wont keep it to her self

something doesnt sound right here hon i would definately get urself tested. if you were spiked and can id the guy then u could stop it happening to someone else. you r very lucky to have such a lovely fiance sound like he is gonna support u thru this. what happened to ur friend hon did she see anything? im sorry if im wrong here ut i didnt think friends left eachother in that kind of state.if she did leave u then she must have thought u were ok which would mean she didnt think u were that drunk, another reason to get tested hon.

casey27 said:
something doesnt sound right here hon i would definately get urself tested. if you were spiked and can id the guy then u could stop it happening to someone else. you r very lucky to have such a lovely fiance sound like he is gonna support u thru this. what happened to ur friend hon did she see anything? im sorry if im wrong here ut i didnt think friends left eachother in that kind of state.if she did leave u then she must have thought u were ok which would mean she didnt think u were that drunk, another reason to get tested hon.

i dont know where the went, i just cant remember.

definately worth trying to ring her and find out what she knows honey, you could use a friend right now. i really hope your gonna be ok hon. and we r all here if u wanna talk xxx

i just cant stop cryin, i keep showerin and washing. i dont know what to do. i dont really wanna mention it to friend as i know it wont stay with them. i work in the same office as my fiance an i know ppl will be wispering behind our back an every1 will know. i only went back to work last tuesday becasue we couldnt manage financly, i dont wanna leave now because of this. an i know it will happen if every1 was to find out

aww hun bless ya, i do think you should go to the police they can help catch this person whoever it is! it does sound to me like you where spiked but you need to know for sure!

your partner sounds like a lovely man and if he said you can get through it then he will be there for you all the way!

hoping things work out hun! sending
let us know if you contact police
jodie xxx

Please, please call the police. The more you say the more I think you were spiked. As well as testing you they will be able to put you in touch with support services and counselling. Try and stay strong, and tell your fiancee what you are thinking so he can help

Hi hun ive just read this - i too think u need to report this to the police im sure ur fiance will support u hun - ive been out and got really drunk before i can hardly control my feet but i still remember every detail from that night - it does saound as if ur drink was spiked hun and it needs to be reported hun - plz let us know how u are and how u get on xxx *HUG*

im not gonna be on for a while now i just wanna spend time with my fiance an our 2 little girls. and also decide what im gonna do..
i cant believe i told him this, believing he would leave me. just goes to show what a good guy i have, i wanna spend as much time as i can with him

thanks guys for all your support, i feel a little better now, after speaking to ppl about it
thanks
xxxxxxxxxx