Join JustParents to ask for advice and make new friends! It only takes 60 seconds. Join for free

So worried I'm going to miscarry again

posted 1 decade 7 years ago
I'm 5 weeks 2 days pregnant today and finding it really hard to get excited as I don't want to get my hopes up. I suffered a miscarriage in Jan at around 5 1/2 weeks so am naturally very anxious.

I keep thinking my breasts aren't as sore (think I'm just getting used to them hurting now) and that I don't feel pregnant anymore. I've been having period like pains and a few mild twinges (which I know are common and nothing to worry about), I also had these before and I'm told it's the uterus stretching. But, if I don't feel anything for a few hours I panic that something's wrong.

I'm going to the loo at every opportunity just to check that I'm not bleeding as I'm so worried that it's going to happen again. My main concern at the moment is even if we do make it to the first scan that there won't be a heartbeat and I'm making myself sick with worry. I've been checking my temperature but to be honest I'm not sure of the average temperature at this stage - does anyone know?

I know there's nothing you can do to prevent it but it doesn't stop you worrying! I want to go to the early pregnancy unit (epu) in about a week just to set my mind at rest but when I miscarried last time I was told that I wouldn't be monitored closely unless I suffered 3 or more miscarriages in a row, so not sure if I'd be allowed unless I was bleeding etc?

Anyway, I know I'm being completely irrational but I just really need to set my mind at rest. I'd like to hear some happy endings from people who have miscarried in the past! And does anyone know if you can go to the (epu) just to set your mind at rest?

Thanks in advance x

AlexAlex Moderator
posted 1 decade 7 years ago
Hiya hun. Sorry to hear about your M/C. CONGRATULATIONS on your new pregnancy Very happy

You worry is normal hun (I am told- never been there myself). Take it easy and rest. as for the EPU I have no idea- I was with community midwives who were always there from the moment of conception. I would phone and ask them before turning up.

Hope someone else has a little bit more knowledge for you and hope everything goes well. Kiss

posted 1 decade 7 years ago
Hi there, firstly, congratulations on your pregnancy Very happy

It is completely normal to think this way. You suffered a devastating loss just not so long ago and is still raw in your memory. I havent suffered a loss like this so cant really begin to imagine how you are feeling right now, but if you can try to relax into this pregnancy. I am sure you will get the rest of week 5 out of the way with no problems and will pass that point when you lost your other baby. After that you will soon be crossing the weeks off your calendar.

We are always here if you ever need to vent your anxieties so please keep in touch

posted 1 decade 7 years ago
Hi Scooby Doo,
Please don't get yourself worked up. I have just miscarried sadly Shocked and might be able to help you out. Take a look at the post on here from me 'SPOTTING IN EARLY PREGNANCY.' I went to the BEP clinic and they did an internal scan, I had lots of blood tests regularly, every other day actually and I think that is the only way to set your mind at ease. I had my hcg level monitored, for a 4week pregnancy the level should be around 2000 plus, but at around 2 weeks mine was less than 200. The midwives were very harsh, they deal with miscarriages evryday and didn't speak with any compassion or empathy at all. A visit to the hospital is not nice when you are already worried but that is the only way you can be certain that everything is okay. Good luck honey, I hope everything goes well for you. Keep us posted,
Love Becs Kiss

posted 1 decade 7 years ago
Hi ScoobyDoo,

I can completely understand your predicament. I suffered 2 miscarriages before I had Ethan.

Your worries are natural! My GP allowed me to go to the EPAU as`I had pain and a history of miscarriage although nothing is looked into until you have 3 or more.

I was the same as you, worrying about my boobs not hurting and going to the loo obsessively just to check for bleeding, I even did this when I was pregnant with Ethan. You just become so terrified of it happenning again.

There is light at the end of the tunnel and I hope you do go on to have a successful pregnancy this time! I was absolutely thrilled when I went to a scan at 7 weeks and saw Ethan's little heartbeating away. I screamed and bawled, I think they thought I was slightly deranged!

If you need to chat just send me a PM, I'm here to listen!

Sending you lots of love and some (((Big Hugs)))


posted 1 decade 7 years ago
Firstly congratulations on your pregnancy, its wonderful news Very happy

Secondly the thoughts and feelings you are having are completely normal. I wasn't supposed to get pg with our eldest so when i did i was totally neurotic until the first scan. Spent ages going to the loo as I had no other symptoms until 9wks when I started being sick all day. I also had a mini-period every month until I was 4mths pg so panicked everytime. I was sent to the EPAU after the first set of bleeding but once they found out it wasn't from my uterus that was it. We had a m/c inbetween both boys then i got pg with #2 and i had a very light bleed at 8wks with him but they said it was down to my condition. Our gp wouldn't send us to EPAU unless we'd had 3 m/c not just the 1. Had no symptoms til 9/10wks with #2 either.

I've just found out i'm expecting again and i've no symptoms except for tiredness which i put down to running round after a 2.5yr & 12mth old baby.

Take it easy and try to focus on the good bits. One day at a time is how i got through. Found by either burying myself in a fav book/dvd best way to keep my mind off it.

Good luck hun and hope everything turns out well for you. XXX Kiss

posted 1 decade 7 years ago
Congratulations on your pregnancy x

My mum had two m/c's and a molar pregnancy and still had three healthy babies.

Like everyone else has suggested, try to not stress yourself out (easier said than done I know), try to keep your mind busy. Your feelings are surely natural (I've not had a m/c but I had bleeding in both pregnancies and the the thought that something is wrong is indescribable).

Sending hugs x

posted 1 decade 7 years ago
Good luck and I hope everything's fine,but to settle your mind abit miscarriage with your first pregnancy is more common than people realise. Many women lose their first pregnancy without even knowing they were pregnant,it is discovered at a later date through medical testing. In many cases it is believed to be the body's way of preparing for the real thing Baby

posted 1 decade 7 years ago
I was in exacty the same situation. My first pregnancy ended at about nine weeks and i was completly gutted. I found out i was pregnant again only a few months later and the worry was unbelieveable. I di the same going to the loo every five minutes just to check.
i spoke to my gp and he said the best thing to do was to just relax. By stressing myself out about i wasn't going to be helping my baby. My partner who was also really affected by the miscarriage tried to reassure by saying if this was our time we would be fine.
I tried to relax myself as best i could. Although it's hard and the worry is always there. But i'm pleased to say i'm now 13 weeks and all seems to be going ok.
Let me know if you need to chat ok hun?
all my love, amy xx

posted 1 decade 7 years ago
i've never suffered a miscarriage and am 20 wks pregs with no2 but still worry, i think its your body getting ready for the worry of motherhood. try to enjoy your pregnancy, i've never had any symptoms of pregnancy until i can feel the baby kicking!! no sickness, tiredness, sore boobs or anything so try and stay positive and good luck. x

posted 1 decade 4 years ago

I have just read your story and can relate 100%, me and my oartner miscarried last october at around 10-11 weeks.. it completley devastated us. We only had to wait a few more months and we found out about a month ago that were expecting Smile Smile Smile Im into my 10th week now but i cant enjoy anything yet as this is around the time we lost last time! i have alot of anxiety and very paranoid constantly going to the toilet. After reasing people responses to your story it has made me look at things in a better light, that things happen for a reason. I have began to believe that i lost the baby last time because my body was not ready for it. But i can understand it doesnt change the constant worries and what if's which go through your mind every second of the day. I know everything is going to be just fine for you and me Smile my partner found this site and this specific forum chat and thought it would help me and it really has! GOOD LUCK!!!

Join JustParents for free to reply


Questions needing your answer

Latest Reviews