Join JustParents to ask for advice and make new friends! It only takes 60 seconds. Join for free

PCOS And a Rookie parent

posted 6 years 5 months ago
hHello! this story is going to need a little bit of context, so we didn't have a very convenient way of having a baby. I have PCOS, and many of you may know that that makes it really difficult for you to have a baby. it was nearly impossible for me to conceive, and I still gave it a try for a long while. we even went for ivf, but even that was unsuccessful. so after all that, the way that we felt was right for us was surrogacy. I had to use an egg donor, but that didn't matter to me, and it felt so right for us to have a baby this way. throughout the pregnancy, my connection to the baby seemed to just grow and grow. every time, I would look at an ultrasound, or hear the surrogate talk about her, I would feel my connection get stronger and stronger. all of that is the backstory part. now we get to the real reason why I posted. we have brought home our little bundle of joy, and we love her with all our hearts. it's just that she cried all through the night, and nothing seems to comfort her, not even for a little bit. I hold her to me, I try to rock her or feed her, but nothing soothes her. I have begun to think that maybe the reason is that I didn't carry her, and so she didn't form that bond with me. I also think that she might feel calmer if I could breastfeed her, which I cant. my husband has been trying to reassure me by saying that that isn't right and that newborns just do cry this much. I wanted to reach out and ask someone else too. is it really a problem, or is it just me being a rookie parent?

posted 6 years 5 months ago
Hey there. I hope that you're doing good. I'm really sorry for your PCOS. It is truly an evil witch. Yes, I know that it causes many problems with the fertility. It's so painful sometimes too. My friend also had this. But she went through IVF and succeeded. Well, it's good too that you chose surrogacy for the purpose. It gives the chance of having babies to those who can't. Okay so here you're thinking so negatively. Whatever happens, happens for a reason. Everything has a good reason for it. I've seen women creating strong bonds with their babies ( by surrogacy ). So yes your husband is right here. You're taking it the wrong way. Maybe you don't have any experience of having children that's why this is happening. Children usually cry this much. So don't worry. You'll get everything under control with time. Take care of yourself and your baby girl. Best of luck.

Join JustParents for free to reply


Questions needing your answer

Latest Reviews