We’re in our 30s. Things are probably a little bit dusty, and a little bit rusty. So, three years ago, we started using apps and calendars to track this and that. Ovulation test sticks. Old wives’ tales of positions and timing. We got some late periods. And some periods that never came!
But we didn’t get pregnant.
So, off to the doctor we went. His and hers appointments for collections of blood and semen and measuring parts and such. Medical science being what it is, we got the answer to all our problems: “You’re fine, and there shouldn’t be a problem.”
Do doctors ever tell anybody, “This is what is wrong, and this is how to fix it,” and then give them pills, and they’re fine? This is not my experience. My experience is: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
We didn’t get pregnant.
We’re in our 30s. Things are probably a little bit dusty, an
Hi rassy05
After reading through your post, I made two conclusions. Either you are fine, or you need to seek a third opinion. As you said, it is sometimes difficult for doctors to tell patients that indeed you will be dying soon. They will tell you this and that, give you hope even when they know that you have less than 24 hours to live. In fact, I can remember when my father was sick, and we were almost giving up. One of the doctors who came to attend to him told us that he had attended to severe cases of the same ailments my father was suffering from and that all the patients he had attended to had all recovered. So my old man was on the path to recovery. I went home and slept soundly only to come back in the morning and find the old man dead. I have never seen that doctor since that time. He owes me an apology/explanation. So my dear, if you follow the advice of your doctor without seeking a third opinion, I am certain that you will die childless. As you have said, you are already in your thirties, and the biological clock is clicking so fast. Soon it may be difficult for you to conceive naturally and give birth. So I recommend that you seek a third opinion lest you regret the way I did. In fact, since that time, I have learned never to trust doctors. I realized that they are just human, not God and so they guess most of the things. Anyway, if you don’t get help, think about IVF and surrogacy. They are the best options for infertile couples.
After reading through your post, I made two conclusions. Either you are fine, or you need to seek a third opinion. As you said, it is sometimes difficult for doctors to tell patients that indeed you will be dying soon. They will tell you this and that, give you hope even when they know that you have less than 24 hours to live. In fact, I can remember when my father was sick, and we were almost giving up. One of the doctors who came to attend to him told us that he had attended to severe cases of the same ailments my father was suffering from and that all the patients he had attended to had all recovered. So my old man was on the path to recovery. I went home and slept soundly only to come back in the morning and find the old man dead. I have never seen that doctor since that time. He owes me an apology/explanation. So my dear, if you follow the advice of your doctor without seeking a third opinion, I am certain that you will die childless. As you have said, you are already in your thirties, and the biological clock is clicking so fast. Soon it may be difficult for you to conceive naturally and give birth. So I recommend that you seek a third opinion lest you regret the way I did. In fact, since that time, I have learned never to trust doctors. I realized that they are just human, not God and so they guess most of the things. Anyway, if you don’t get help, think about IVF and surrogacy. They are the best options for infertile couples.
Hi Rassy05
I think in the 30s you are still productive and so you should obliterate the idea that you have grown dusty from your mind. I think you need to seek a third opinion. Some doctors will not tell you “No” even when they have no idea of what it is that is troubling you. They know they are the help of last resort. In their training, they learned that the body is self-healing and could recover on its own if certain conditions are satisfied. One of the conditions is making the patient relax and feel that all is well. In fact, you will be shocked to learn that some of the diseases people seek medical on just heal on their own. So the drugs and the injections play no role at all. That being the case, I am of the opinion that you seek a different reproductive doctor. This way the cause of your infertility will be identified, and you will be advised to take steps that can help you conceive and become happy parents. It is true that the latest technology has made it possible for a man to go round the problem of infertility. IVF, IUI, and surrogacy are the three reproductive intervention methods that can put a smile on your face in less than one year. But first, as I have mentioned, the cause of your infertility needs to be diagnosed before you can be put on the right procedure. However, if you don’t feel like wasting more time and money on tests, you may opt for IVF. It has enabled more than 5 million children to be born around the globe.
I think in the 30s you are still productive and so you should obliterate the idea that you have grown dusty from your mind. I think you need to seek a third opinion. Some doctors will not tell you “No” even when they have no idea of what it is that is troubling you. They know they are the help of last resort. In their training, they learned that the body is self-healing and could recover on its own if certain conditions are satisfied. One of the conditions is making the patient relax and feel that all is well. In fact, you will be shocked to learn that some of the diseases people seek medical on just heal on their own. So the drugs and the injections play no role at all. That being the case, I am of the opinion that you seek a different reproductive doctor. This way the cause of your infertility will be identified, and you will be advised to take steps that can help you conceive and become happy parents. It is true that the latest technology has made it possible for a man to go round the problem of infertility. IVF, IUI, and surrogacy are the three reproductive intervention methods that can put a smile on your face in less than one year. But first, as I have mentioned, the cause of your infertility needs to be diagnosed before you can be put on the right procedure. However, if you don’t feel like wasting more time and money on tests, you may opt for IVF. It has enabled more than 5 million children to be born around the globe.
I am so sorry to hear what you have been through all these years. I can understand it’s very difficult to digest it when there is no clear answer to your problem in medical science. I would suggest you change your doctor and try some other doctor, as it’s always better to take the second opinion before proceeding forward. But would like to bring into your account that there is a term called unexplained infertility, where there is everything fine with both the partners but they are still unable to get pregnant. In that cases, there are chances that you become pregnant without any medical assistance but how long you have to wait for science has no answer to it. you can choose to wait or go for either IUI, IVF or surrogacy. Wish you good luck.
Hi, well conceiving has always been natural and no one can tell you what exactly the problem is. Some doctors might tell you a problem and in the end, the problem diagnosed is not the actual cause. Apps might not help you and sometimes ovulation stimulation medicines are also not effective, depending on the whole internal system of the body. There is always a 1% chance that you don’t get pregnant even after several tries and fertility treatments. Since how long have you been trying to conceive? I hope you are young and there is nothing wrong with you. Let me tell you a similar story to which you can associate yourself with. My cousin who got married 5 years ago was not conceiving and the doctors ultimately told her that she can't conceive and informed her about her infertility issues. She was shattered by that time but still she continued TTC and you know what; she conceived just after 5 years of ultimate struggle to conceive. I would suggest that still if you can't get pregnant why don't you list down your options for infertility treatments. There is a solution to everything now as the world is advancing and evolving. I have heard quite a bunch of success stories for IVF and surrogacy. You just need to do a little saving in this case and pen down the clinics where surrogacy is carried out. I hope you find an answer to your urge. Best of luck.
Hello there!
Well I always hate it too when you just can't know. I mean it must be either this or that. How can it be nothing with me going through it? That would translate to ' I'm going through nothing' . Now that is just plain stupid.
But that's the way it is sometimes. So just can't know, no matter how hard you want to.
I'm sorry that you guys were not successful in conceiving. Maybe keep trying? I really don't have much to tell you (sorry for acting like medical science).
I hope for you nothing but the best!
Well I always hate it too when you just can't know. I mean it must be either this or that. How can it be nothing with me going through it? That would translate to ' I'm going through nothing' . Now that is just plain stupid.
But that's the way it is sometimes. So just can't know, no matter how hard you want to.
I'm sorry that you guys were not successful in conceiving. Maybe keep trying? I really don't have much to tell you (sorry for acting like medical science).
I hope for you nothing but the best!
Hello ladies.Don't take the stress.Stress takes a lot of toll on your body.Women generally, have some decrease in fertility starting in their early 30s. And while many women in their 30s and 40s have no problems getting pregnant, fertility especially declines after age 35. As a woman ages, normal changes that occur in her ovaries and eggs make it harder to become pregnant. Even though menstrual cycles continue to be regular in a woman's 30s and 40s, the eggs that ovulate each month are of poorer quality than those from her 20s. It is harder to get pregnant when the eggs are poorer in quality. As a woman nears menopause, the ovaries may not release an egg each month, which also can make it harder to get pregnant.Wishing you a very beautiful future with the beautiful baby.Just trying don't lose hope and it will happen one day.Good luck.
I see how you have been doing the same efforts as us. Sigh, we try so hard to just conceive. If only our lucks were kind enough. I also tried everything from home remedies to the most illogical practices. Nothing worked for me. It felt so bad whenever we would see couples laughing together with their babies. I am happy for them but why can't I have that? Just like you, we gave up TTC and went for surrogacy. I had a friend who had gone through this procedure at a renowned clinic. SO and I went for it, too, after a lot of thinking. By that time, we had realized that I'll never be able to fall PG naturally. Sometimes, natural just isn't the way to go, I guess. Well, now I'm blessed with a beautiful little girl. She loves me like my own born child would. I love her the same, too, but still, there's this little hole in my chest craving for a child born from my body. I guess I'll just learn to be happy with what I have. After all, this surrogacy did give us the life that we had been missing.
Dear Rassy, your post has so many dimensions to it. It is multifaceted. It makes the reader think that what is actually happening. It is not infertility but still, nothing is working out for you. Apparently medical science says that you are not facing any critical problem. This does not mean that you stay quiet and get contended with what the doctors have suggested. It can be anything behind this whole story. Sometimes things change with the time. Initially there are no challenges but as the time passes the symptons become clearaer. Your description says that you are a very conscious and vigilant TTC. All through these years you have keenly observed the happenings with you. Thus, I believe there is no negligence on your part. You have observed everything very keenly and have tried to take full control of the situation,. Your issue currently is that you don't have a proper diagnosis of what is actually delaying the conception. All is well thing is stated by the doctors. I suggest that please don't stop here. There are endless options for the IPs to get tested. I think you must consult some other medical practotioner for some tests. I hope that these will make the things more clear.
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