I Just Don't Know What To Do

Ok, My divorce from my babies father was just final last week. I have tried very hard to keep the situation as far away from my daughter as possible even though she is still too young to understand. I don't like for us to argue in front of her. I don't think it's healthy.So, I just refuse to do it.

I really have tried to be the bigger person throughout the whole divorce. Jason was abusive. To me. And I was afraid he would become abusive to my daughter so I left him. It's over now and he is still mentally abusive to me. He just won't leave me alone. I want us to be able to get along. We need to be able to at least be civil for my daughter and for this new baby I am pregnant with. It can't be healthy for him to be stressing me out this much while I am pregnant. How do I get the point across to him that he is going to have to stop???

aww hun i really dont know....coz he sounds like the sort of person who wont listen to you, maybe u need to go to a counsellor to sort things out....he obv needs help with his anger...

You could tell him you're going for sole custody if he doesn't sort himself out. I know this would be something you'd probably never consider, for your daughter's sake, but the threat in a lawyer's letter might shake him up a bit. It might make him worse though, comin to think of it. Could you write him a letter? Spill your thoughts on the page so that he can see every angle, and fully understand that you will do that, as a last resort. Also make sure he realises that you know how important your daughter is to him etc. If he has time to read it over more than once, he'll maybe understand what you mean better.

If he's not the type of man who understands that kind of thing, then I'm not sure what to recommend, other than drastic action. If he's abusive then, realistically, what's stopping him abusing your kids? As you are now split up, he will be 'caring' for them under joint custody, when you aren't there. That seems a bit risky to me.

Hope you get things sorted.
xxx

Is there anyone that can be a mediator for you both?It might help a little while your pregnant to not have any direct contact with him.I would look into some sort of legal advise if you think he might be abusive towards the children.
Hope it all gets sorted soon good luck